Holiday guide: staying in this December

Holiday date ideas at home for whichever holiday you celebrate

18 curated ideas · December

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The holiday season is crowded. There are parties, travel, family visits and a long list of things to buy and wrap, and by the middle of December a lot of couples realize they have not had an evening to themselves in weeks. Staying in is the answer, as long as staying in is a plan rather than a collapse onto the couch. These ideas are all at home and most of them cost very little. They also work whichever holiday you keep, whether that is Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, the solstice or simply the end of the year. Some turn chores into dates, like wrapping gifts with a film on or writing the holiday cards together. Some build traditions, like baking both families' signature recipe or merging your childhood customs into something new. Others are just about rest: a hideout night with the door locked, a pajama day with a written menu, a picnic on the floor in front of the fire. Choose a few, put them on the calendar between the busy nights, and let home be where the season actually feels good.

When to plan it

The holiday season at home runs from early December to the first days of January. Hanukkah moves each year on the Gregorian calendar, Christmas is December 25, and Kwanzaa runs from December 26 to January 1, so check the dates that matter to you and plan around them. The ideas that build up to something, like handmade gifts or the movie draft, need to start in the first week of December.

18 holiday date ideas at home

  • Bake both families' signature recipe

    Each of you teaches the other the one holiday bake your family always makes, exactly the way it is made at home. Then you argue, lovingly, about whose is better.

    ~3 hours Low cost indoor
    How to make it work

    Setup. Both recipes, ideally checked with whoever makes them at home, and every ingredient laid out before you start.

    1. Flip a coin for who teaches first. The teacher is not allowed to touch the bowl.
    2. Swap. The second recipe is taught the same way.
    3. Plate both on one board and taste them side by side.
    4. Write both recipes on one card. That card is now a family recipe for the two of you.

    Talk about: What is a holiday smell that takes you straight back to being a kid?

  • A holiday movie draft

    Like a fantasy sports draft, but for festive films. You take turns picking until you each have a lineup of four, then watch one from each side over the season and keep score.

    All season Free indoor
    How to make it work

    Setup. A shared list of every holiday film you can think of, a coin, a notebook for the scores, and the season ahead.

    1. Brainstorm the list together. Classics, cartoons and the terrible ones all count.
    2. Flip for first pick and draft in turns until each of you has four films.
    3. Watch one film from each lineup per week. The other rates it out of ten.
    4. Crown a winner on the last night of the year.

    Talk about: Which holiday film do you love that you are slightly embarrassed to admit?

  • Build a hot cocoa bar and invent a house drink

    Set out cocoa, milk, spices, syrups and toppings like a café counter. Each of you invents one drink for the other, names it, and the best one becomes the house cocoa.

    ~1 hour Low cost indoor
    How to make it work

    Setup. Good cocoa or chocolate, milk or oat milk, cinnamon, chili, vanilla, peppermint, whipped cream, marshmallows and a few mugs.

    1. Lay everything out on a board, café style.
    2. Each of you makes a drink for the other in secret and gives it a name.
    3. Taste, score, and make a second round with what you learned.
    4. Write the winning recipe on a card and stick it inside a cupboard door.

    Talk about: What would our house have on the menu if we opened a tiny café?

  • A gift wrapping night with a film on

    Turn the dreaded wrapping session into a date: clear the table, put on a film you have both seen, pour something nice and wrap every gift together, except the ones for each other.

    ~2.5 hours Free indoor
    How to make it work

    Setup. All the gifts, paper, tape, scissors, ribbon, labels, a film you know by heart, and a separate room for your gifts to each other.

    1. Set up an assembly line: one of you cuts, the other folds and tapes.
    2. Swap jobs halfway so nobody gets stuck with the ribbon.
    3. Write the labels with a small, silly message for each recipient.
    4. Take turns leaving the room to wrap the gift for each other in secret.

    Talk about: Which gift this year are you most excited for someone to open?

  • Write the holiday cards together, plus one for each other

    Make writing cards a shared evening instead of a chore. You split the list, read the funny ones aloud, and at the end each of you writes one real card to the other.

    ~2 hours Low cost indoor
    How to make it work

    Setup. Cards, stamps, the address list, two good pens, and something warm to drink.

    1. Split the list by who knows whom best.
    2. Write a line of real news in each card, not just names.
    3. Read your favorite message aloud before you seal it.
    4. Write a card to each other last. Do not open it until the holiday itself.

    Talk about: Who are we closer to this year than last year?

  • Merge your traditions into a new one

    Each of you describes three traditions from your childhood holidays. Pick one from each list and combine them into something that is only yours, then do it that night.

    ~1.5 hours Free indoor
    How to make it work

    Setup. Paper, two pens, and whatever you need to try the new tradition straight away.

    1. Write three childhood traditions each, big or small.
    2. Tell the story behind each one. Ask questions.
    3. Pick one from each list and invent a version that blends them.
    4. Do it tonight, and decide if it stays.

    Talk about: Which tradition from your childhood do you want to make sure our life includes?

  • A latke frying night

    Whether one of you grew up with Hanukkah or you are both curious, frying latkes together is a warm, messy evening. One grates, one fries, both eat them straight from the pan.

    ~1.5 hours Low cost indoor
    How to make it work

    Setup. Potatoes, onion, eggs, flour or matzo meal, oil for frying, applesauce and sour cream, and a box grater or food processor.

    1. Grate the potatoes and onion, then squeeze out as much water as you can in a clean towel.
    2. Mix with egg and a little flour or matzo meal. Season well.
    3. Fry in small batches. Taste the first one and adjust the salt.
    4. Eat with both toppings and decide which side you are on.

    Tip. If one of you celebrates Hanukkah, let them lead and tell the story behind the food and the oil.

    Talk about: What is a tradition from a culture other than yours that you would love to learn properly?

  • Decorate the tree, one story per ornament

    Before an ornament goes on the tree, whoever holds it tells the story behind it. The new ones get a story too: where you were when you bought it and what was going on.

    ~2 hours Free indoor
    How to make it work

    Setup. The tree, the boxes of decorations, a playlist, and no rush.

    1. Do the lights first, together, before any ornament goes up.
    2. Take turns picking an ornament from the box. Story first, then hang it.
    3. Leave one ornament from each of your childhoods for last.
    4. Turn the room lights off and sit with just the tree for ten minutes.

    Talk about: Which ornament would you save if the house were on fire?

  • A holiday dinner for two, a week early

    If the real holiday belongs to family, hold your own a week before. Cook the meal you would make if it were only the two of you, set the table properly and exchange one gift.

    ~3 hours Low cost indoor
    How to make it work

    Setup. A menu you choose together, the good plates, candles, and an evening with nothing after it.

    1. Plan the menu together a few days ahead and shop as a pair.
    2. Cook side by side with music on.
    3. Dress up a little, even at home.
    4. Exchange one gift at the table and save the rest.

    Talk about: What do you want our holidays to look like in five years?

  • The holiday hideout night

    Between the parties and the family visits, pick one night where you lock the door, silence the group chats and pretend nobody knows you live there. Everything about it is about rest.

    All evening Free indoor
    How to make it work

    Setup. Food that needs no cooking, the comfiest clothes you own, phones on do not disturb, and a sign on the door if you want to commit.

    1. Make a pact: no talking about family, gifts or logistics.
    2. Order in or eat a board of snacks on the floor.
    3. Do the laziest thing you both enjoy, together.
    4. Go to bed early and sleep late.

    Talk about: What do you need more of this month, and how can I help you get it?

  • A full pajama day with a menu

    Choose one day off where neither of you gets dressed. Write a menu for the whole day, from a slow breakfast to a fancy dinner eaten in pajamas, and stick to it.

    A whole day Low cost indoor
    How to make it work

    Setup. A day with no plans, groceries bought the day before, and a handwritten menu on the fridge.

    1. Write the day's menu together the night before: breakfast, snack, lunch, a treat, dinner.
    2. Cook each meal together. Eat each one somewhere different in the house.
    3. Fill the gaps with a game, a nap, a book or a film.

    Talk about: What does a perfect lazy day look like for you, start to finish?

  • Make a wreath from the yard

    Walk your yard or street for evergreen branches, holly, ivy and pinecones, then build a wreath on a wire ring at the kitchen table. It smells incredible and lasts for weeks.

    ~2 hours Free indoor / outdoor
    How to make it work

    Setup. A wire wreath ring, florist wire, pruning shears, ribbon, and greenery from your own yard or a friend's.

    1. Collect more greenery than you think you need, only from places you have permission to cut.
    2. Make small bundles and wire them to the ring, all facing the same way.
    3. Add pinecones and berries last.
    4. Hang it on the door together and take a photo.

    Talk about: Where would you want to live if we only cared about how it felt in winter?

  • A holiday playlist guessing game

    Each of you secretly adds ten songs to one shared holiday playlist. Shuffle it, and for every song guess who picked it and why. You will learn something about each other.

    ~1 hour Free indoor
    How to make it work

    Setup. A shared playlist on whatever app you use, ten songs each added in secret, and a notepad for the scores.

    1. Add your ten songs separately. Mix famous ones with deep cuts.
    2. Shuffle and play. Guess who added each song before the first chorus.
    3. The picker tells the memory behind it.
    4. Keep the playlist for next year and add to it every December.

    Talk about: Which holiday song is tied to a memory you have never told me about?

  • A fireside picnic on the living room floor

    Spread a blanket in front of the fireplace, or a fireplace video on the TV if you do not have one, and eat dinner on the floor by firelight. It feels like a cabin without leaving home.

    ~2.5 hours Low cost indoor
    How to make it work

    Setup. A big blanket, cushions, a cheese board or a simple dinner, candles, and either a real fire or a crackling fire video.

    1. Turn off every overhead light. Candles and fire only.
    2. Eat slowly, picnic style, with everything within reach.
    3. Stay on the floor after dinner and talk or read until the fire dies down.

    Tip. Keep the blanket, cushions and candles well back from the fire, use the fire screen, and put every flame out before bed.

    Talk about: What is your favorite memory of being somewhere cold and cozy?

  • Pack care packages at the kitchen table

    Fill a few boxes for people who need them: a local shelter's wish list, a friend spending the holidays alone, or a relative far away. It is a generous evening that stays at home.

    ~2 hours Low cost indoor
    How to make it work

    Setup. A few sturdy boxes, items from the shelter's list or small treats for friends, cards, tape and a marker.

    1. Decide together who the packages are for.
    2. Shop once, then pack them as a team: one of you fills, the other writes the cards.
    3. Drop them off or mail them together the next day.

    Talk about: Who has been quietly good to us this year that we should thank?

  • Learn a December holiday neither of you grew up with

    Pick a winter celebration from another culture, such as Kwanzaa, Saint Lucia's Day, the Winter Solstice or Las Posadas. Read about it together and cook one traditional dish.

    ~2.5 hours Low cost indoor
    How to make it work

    Setup. An hour of reading from good sources, one recipe connected to the holiday, and the ingredients for it.

    1. Each of you reads about the holiday for 20 minutes, then teach each other what you learned.
    2. Cook the dish together and talk about what the celebration means to the people who keep it.
    3. Decide whether any part of it belongs in your own December.

    Talk about: What do you think our traditions say about what we value?

  • Make each other one gift by hand

    Agree that this year you each make the other one present: a framed photo, a recipe book, a knitted scarf, a song. Give each other a few weeks, then exchange them on a quiet night.

    A few weeks Free indoor
    How to make it work

    Setup. A shared deadline, a few weeks, and whatever materials your gift needs.

    1. Agree on the rules: handmade, no buying the finished thing.
    2. Work on your gift in secret over the following weeks.
    3. Exchange them on a night at home, with the lights low.
    4. Each of you explains why you made what you made.

    Talk about: What is something someone made for you that you still have?

  • Paper snowflakes and window lights

    Cut a flurry of paper snowflakes, hang string lights around the window, and turn your front window into something people on your street will notice. Cheap, calm and oddly competitive.

    ~1.5 hours Free indoor
    How to make it work

    Setup. A stack of white paper, two pairs of sharp scissors, tape, a strand of string lights, and a tutorial for six point snowflakes.

    1. Learn the fold together. It is easier than it looks.
    2. Each of you cuts ten. Reveal them one by one and pick favorites.
    3. Tape them up around the lights in the front window.
    4. Go outside and look at it from the street.

    Talk about: What made you feel at home when you were little?

What it costs

Free
A movie draft, a tree story night, a hideout night, the playlist game, paper snowflakes or merging traditions.
Low cost
A cocoa bar, a latke night, a family recipe bake, holiday cards or a wreath from the yard.
Moderate
An early holiday dinner for two with good ingredients, or care packages for people who need them.
Splurge
A catered dinner at home, or a cozy rental nearby to do the hideout night somewhere new.

Where you live changes the plan

In Australia and New Zealand

The holidays fall in summer, so many of these move outside after dark. Swap hot cocoa for iced drinks and save the fire ideas for a midwinter night in July.

For Christmas outings

Want to get out of the house? Lights drives, markets, shows and the Boxing Day walk are on the Christmas page.

Christmas date ideas

Tips to make it land

  • Put home dates on the calendar like any other plan. A night in only stays a date if neither of you treats it as spare time for errands.
  • Change one thing about the room. Candles instead of overhead lights, a blanket on the floor or a set table makes the same living room feel like an occasion.
  • If one of you celebrates a holiday the other did not grow up with, let them lead and tell the stories. It is one of the nicest ways to learn each other.
  • Keep one evening in the busiest week completely empty. Rest is part of the season too.

Frequently asked questions

What are some holiday date ideas at home?

Try a holiday movie draft, a hot cocoa bar where you invent a house drink, a gift wrapping night with a film, baking both families' signature recipe, a fireside picnic on the floor, or a pajama day with a written menu. Each one turns an ordinary evening at home into something planned.

What are cheap holiday date ideas for couples?

Most at home ideas are free or low cost: decorating the tree one story at a time, a playlist guessing game, paper snowflakes in the window, merging your traditions, or making each other a gift by hand. A cocoa bar or a latke night costs about the same as a normal dinner.

What can we do for the holidays if we celebrate different holidays?

Take turns leading. One of you teaches a tradition, a recipe or a story from your own holiday and the other joins in, and then you swap. Merging a tradition from each side into a new one that belongs to both of you is a lovely way to mark the season together.

How do we avoid burnout as a couple during the holidays?

Plan rest the way you plan parties. Pick one hideout night where you see nobody, agree on family plans early, say no to at least one invitation, and keep the dates you do plan small and close to home.

Do these ideas work in summer, in Australia or New Zealand?

Most do. The cocoa bar becomes an iced drink bar, the fireside picnic moves to the balcony after dark, and the wrapping night, cards, movie draft and playlist game work in any weather. Save the wreath and the fire for a winter night in July.

From the Twogle blog