Christmas date ideas for the busiest, brightest month of the year

17 Christmas date ideas

• A Christmas lights drive with a scorecard

  Print two scorecards, fill a thermos with cocoa, and drive the streets that go all out. Score every house on brightness, theme and nerve. The arguments are the best part.

  ~1.5 hours Free outdoor
  How to make it work

  Setup. Two scorecards with four categories (brightness, theme, nerve, overall), a clipboard, pens, a thermos of cocoa, and a list of streets known for lights.

  1. The passenger navigates and reads out each address. Both of you score in silence, the driver only while parked.
  2. Compare scores after every five houses and argue for one minute, no more.
  3. Pick a winner and a "most chaotic" award.
  4. If you are brave, leave a thank you note on the winner's doorstep.

  Tip. Go on a weeknight in the middle of December. Weekends near Christmas can mean slow traffic on the famous streets.

  Talk about: What is the most Christmas thing your family ever did?

• Choose a real tree together

  Go to a tree farm or a lot and pick the tree as a team. You will disagree about height, shape and how bare one side is allowed to be, and you will remember the tree for years.

  ~3 hours Moderate outdoor
  How to make it work

  Setup. Measurements of your ceiling and the spot where the tree goes, gloves, rope or straps for the car, and an old blanket for the roof.

  1. Each of you shortlists one tree without telling the other.
  2. Show each other your picks and make the case. Compromise on a third if you must.
  3. If it is a cut your own farm, take turns with the saw.
  4. At home, put it up before dinner and leave the lights for later.

  Talk about: What did your Christmas tree look like growing up, and who decorated it?

• A gingerbread house with architect rules

  One of you is the architect who draws the plan, the other is the builder who has to follow it. Halfway through you swap roles. Collapses are part of the design.

  ~2 hours Low cost indoor
  How to make it work

  Setup. A gingerbread kit or homemade panels, royal icing in two piping bags, a bowl of candy, paper and a pencil.

  1. The first architect sketches the front and one side. The builder may ask questions but not change the plan.
  2. Swap at the halfway point. The new architect designs the roof and the yard.
  3. Give the house a name and a backstory.
  4. Photograph it from the front like a real estate listing.

  Talk about: If we could build our actual dream home, what is the one room you would insist on?

• A Christmas market with a three part mission

  Many towns now run a Christmas market. Go with a mission: one hot drink each, one ornament for the tree, and one food neither of you has ever eaten.

  ~2.5 hours Low cost outdoor
  How to make it work

  Setup. Warm gloves, a small tote, and a budget you agree on before you arrive.

  1. Do a full lap before buying anything.
  2. Pick your hot drink first and carry it as you browse.
  3. Choose the ornament together. It has to remind you of this year.
  4. Finish with the food you have never tried. Rate it honestly.

  Talk about: What do you want to remember about this December, ten years from now?

• Sing carols out loud, together

  Join a community carol sing, a candlelit carol service or a group going door to door. You do not need to be good. You need to be loud on the chorus and willing to laugh.

  ~2 hours Free indoor / outdoor
  How to make it work

  Setup. Look up local carol events or ask a neighbor. Bring a warm hat, a flashlight for the song sheet, and a thermos.

  1. Learn the second verse of two carols on the way. Most people only know the first.
  2. Stand close enough to share one song sheet.
  3. Afterward, warm up somewhere and hum the one you cannot get out of your head.

  Talk about: Which song instantly makes it feel like the holidays for you?

• A Christmas show neither of you would pick alone

  A local production of A Christmas Carol, a ballet company's Nutcracker, or a community choir concert. Dress up a little, have dinner first, and give the show your full attention.

  ~4 hours Moderate indoor
  How to make it work

  Setup. Tickets for a holiday performance, dinner booked nearby, and an outfit that feels like an occasion.

  1. Have an early dinner close to the theater so nobody is rushing.
  2. During intermission, each of you predicts how the second half goes.
  3. On the way home, swap your favorite moment and the moment you nearly nodded off.

  Talk about: Who would you be in A Christmas Carol: Scrooge, Bob Cratchit, or a ghost?

• Go to a pantomime

  The UK and Irish Christmas show where you boo the villain, shout "he's behind you" and get hit by sweets thrown from the stage. It is ridiculous and it is wonderful as a couple.

  ~3 hours Moderate indoor UK and Ireland
  How to make it work

  Setup. Tickets to a local panto, preferably an evening show with more grown ups in the audience, and permission to be loud.

  1. Learn the call and response before you go. The cast will make you use it.
  2. Choose one character each to cheer for and boo with total commitment.
  3. Go for a drink after and rank the worst puns.

  Talk about: What is the silliest thing you have ever done in public and secretly loved?

• The twelve small dates of Christmas

  Instead of one big date, plan twelve tiny ones across December, each under an hour. You alternate who plans, and the other gets a sealed envelope on the morning of.

  12 short dates Free indoor / outdoor
  How to make it work

  Setup. Twelve envelopes, a calendar, and a list of small ideas: a cocoa walk, a carol, a cookie, a dance, a letter.

  1. Sit down on December 1 and split the twelve dates: six each.
  2. Write each one on a card and seal it in an envelope with the date on the front.
  3. Open the envelope that morning. Do the date that evening, no excuses.
  4. On the last one, choose your favorite and make it an annual tradition.

  Tip. Keep at least four of the twelve free and at home, so a hectic week never breaks the chain.

  Talk about: Which of these little dates surprised you the most?

• Make one ornament that sums up your year

  Each December, make a single ornament together that captures the year: a place you went, a joke you shared, a thing that changed. In ten years the tree tells your story.

  ~1.5 hours Low cost indoor
  How to make it work

  Setup. A clear fillable ornament, salt dough or air dry clay, paint, ribbon, and a fine pen for the date.

  1. List the three biggest moments of your year. Pick one to represent it.
  2. Design it together, then build it with one pair of hands each.
  3. Write the year on the bottom and hang it at eye level.

  Talk about: If this year had a symbol, what would it be?

• Decorate two ugly Christmas sweaters

  Buy two plain sweaters from a thrift store and make them gloriously ugly with felt, pompoms and a glue gun. Then wear them somewhere public.

  ~2 hours Low cost indoor
  How to make it work

  Setup. Two plain sweaters, a glue gun, felt, pompoms, tinsel, bells, safety pins, and a party or dinner to wear them to.

  1. Each of you designs the other's sweater. The wearer gets one veto.
  2. Give yourselves an hour to make them.
  3. Do a fashion show in the hallway.
  4. Wear them out that night, to a party, a pub or a pizza place.

  Talk about: What is something you would love me to do just because it would make you laugh?

• Five small gifts, one theme

  Agree on a tiny limit and a theme, like "things that make Tuesday better" or "the year in five objects." Shop separately for an hour, then open everything over hot chocolate.

  ~2.5 hours Low cost indoor / outdoor
  How to make it work

  Setup. A theme you pick together, a small spending limit, one hour apart in the same shopping street, and wrapping paper.

  1. Pick the theme and the limit together.
  2. Shop separately for one hour. Five gifts each, all inside the limit.
  3. Wrap them in the car or a café bathroom if you have to.
  4. Open them one at a time and explain each choice.

  Talk about: Which small thing in your daily life would you most like to upgrade?

• Shop for a giving tree tag together

  Pick a tag from a giving tree or toy drive at a library, school or community center and shop for it as a team. It is a short, generous date that changes the mood of December.

  ~2 hours Low cost indoor / outdoor
  How to make it work

  Setup. A local toy drive or giving tree, the tag details, and an hour to shop together.

  1. Choose the tag together and read the wish carefully.
  2. Shop for it as if it were for a niece or nephew you adore.
  3. Wrap it nicely and drop it off together before the deadline.

  Talk about: What is the best gift anyone ever gave you as a kid?

• Pack each other a Christmas Eve box

  A box to open on Christmas Eve: new pajamas, a film, a hot chocolate kit and one small surprise. Pack one for each other and open them together after dinner.

  ~3 hours Low cost indoor
  How to make it work

  Setup. Two shoeboxes or gift boxes, tissue paper, and a few small things each: pajamas, socks, a treat, a film, a note.

  1. Pack your boxes in secret the week before.
  2. On Christmas Eve, open them together after dinner.
  3. Put on the pajamas, make the hot chocolate, and watch the film from the box you picked first.

  Talk about: What did Christmas Eve feel like when you were seven?

• Christmas morning for two, before anyone else

  If the day belongs to family, take the first hour for yourselves. Wake early, exchange your gifts to each other in private, and have coffee by the tree before the house or the phones wake up.

  ~1 hour Free indoor
  How to make it work

  Setup. Your gifts to each other set aside the night before, coffee ready to brew, and an alarm 60 minutes earlier than anyone else in the house.

  1. Get up quietly. Turn on only the tree lights.
  2. Open your gifts to each other first, slowly, one at a time.
  3. Each of you says one thing you love about the year you had together.
  4. Then let the day begin.

  Talk about: What do you want next Christmas to look like for us?

• The Boxing Day walk

  December 26 is a public holiday in the UK, Ireland, Australia and New Zealand, and a day off for many in Canada. It is made for a long walk and leftovers in a backpack.

  ~3 hours Free outdoor
  How to make it work

  Setup. A coastal path, a hill or a long park loop, layers, and a leftover sandwich each.

  1. Leave late morning once everyone has had breakfast.
  2. Walk with no destination for the first half hour, then pick a turnaround.
  3. Eat the sandwiches somewhere with a view.
  4. On the way back, each of you names one hope for the new year.

  Tip. In Ireland, December 26 is St Stephen's Day, and in Australia and New Zealand it is high summer, so swap the hill for a beach.

  Talk about: What was your favorite part of yesterday, honestly?

• A Christmas Day swim and a seafood lunch

  For Australia and New Zealand: start Christmas Day with an early swim before the beach fills, then a long lunch of prawns, salad and pavlova in the shade.

  ~5 hours Moderate outdoor Australia / NZ
  How to make it work

  Setup. Swimmers, towels, sunscreen, a cooler bag, and a plan for lunch either at home or in a shady park.

  1. Get to the water early, before the heat and the crowds.
  2. Swim, then sit on the sand with a coffee and say happy Christmas properly.
  3. Make lunch together: one of you on the seafood, the other on the pavlova.
  4. Eat it slowly in the shade and nap after.

  Tip. Pick a patrolled beach and swim between the red and yellow flags. Christmas Day crowds and rips both run high.

  Talk about: Which Christmas tradition from somewhere else do you secretly envy?

• Carols on a summer night

  Australia and New Zealand hold outdoor carol concerts on warm December evenings. Bring a picnic rug, a candle each and dinner in a basket, and sing under the open sky.

  ~3 hours Free outdoor Australia / NZ
  How to make it work

  Setup. A local outdoor carols event, a picnic rug, a cooler with dinner, insect repellent and two candles or the event's candle packs.

  1. Arrive early to claim a good patch of grass and eat before the singing starts.
  2. Light your candles when the sun goes down.
  3. Sing the ones you know, hum the ones you do not.
  4. Walk home or to the car slowly while the crowd thins out.

  Talk about: Where were you on Christmas the year before we met?